FIXED – How To Win Friends & Influence People – Bookcast #11

Edit – Audio file is fixed – Sorry for the inconvenience.

How To Win Friends and Influence People (1936) by Dale Carnegie

For over 80 years the rock-solid, time-tested advice in this book has carried thousands of now-famous people up the ladder of success in their business and personal lives.

With this truly phenomenal book, you will learn the six ways to make people like you, the twelve ways to win people to your way of thinking, the nine ways to change people without arousing resentment and much, much more!

There is room at the top when you know…How to Win Friends and Influence People.

Read and listen to “How To Win Friends and Influence People” on Amazon!

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“How To Win Friends and Influence People” Show Notes

0:00 – Intro to “How To Win Friends and Influence People”

  • The grandfather of modern self-help, Dale Carnegie’s books, and courses changed the face of modern America. 80 years ago Carnegie’s material gave anyone a chance to upgrade their communication capacity, boost their social skills and get more money and opportunity – and the skills he teaches are more relevant now than ever.
  • Intended audience: Anyone who wants to get better with people.
  • People who won’t like it: People who don’t like “old” books, hermits and other misanthropes.

5:30 – How easy is the book to read?

  • Easy to read
  • Print: 285 pages (6 – 8 hours)
  • Audio: 7.25 hours

6:00 – Reviews and Significance of “How To Win Friends…”

  • THE modern classic on making and maintaining friendships
  • 16,625 4.5 star ratings
  • Currently (as of 3/3/20): 
    • #16 Amazon – Self Help
    • #38 Amazon – Business and Money
    • #30 Audible – Overall Audible books 
    • #1 Audible – Friendship
    • #2 Audible – Family and Relationships

7:30 – How Matt and Jay found “How To Win Friends…”

10:00 – Bio of Dale Carnegie

  • Born on a farm in Maryville Missouri in 1888 
  • Enjoyed public speaking and was on a debate team in high school
  • Noted for saying he woke up at 3 am to milk cows and feed pigs before walking to school
  • Became salesman after college, selling correspondence courses to ranchers, as well as bacon, soap, and lard
  • 1911 – Started a local course at the YMCA to teach public speaking. Found people didn’t have trouble speaking publicly if they were angry about a given subject. In three years he was making about $500/week for his “self-confidence classes” (equivalent to ~$13,400/week today)
  • Wrote hundreds of essays and multiple books, including “The Art of Public Speaking,” “How To Stop Worrying and Start Living,” “Lincoln the Unknown” and the classic “How To Win Friends and Influence People”
  • 1936 – Published “How To Win Friends.” The book was an immediate best-seller. By the time of his death, it had sold over 5 million copies and was translated into 31 languages.
  • 1955 – Carnegie died of Hodgkin’s disease. He was 67

13:30 – Major Themes of the Book

  • Part I. Fundamental techniques in handling people: “If you want to gather honey, don’t kick over the beehive”
    • The big secret of dealing with people
  • Part II. Six ways to make people like you: Do this and you’ll be welcome anywhere
    • A simple way to make a good first impression
    • An easy way to become a good conversationalist
    • How to interest people
    • How to make people like you instantly
  • Part III. How to win people to your way of thinking: You can’t win an argument
    • A sure way of making enemies, and how to avoid it
    • If you’re wrong, admit it
    • The safety valve in handling complaints
    • How to get cooperation
    • What everybody wants
    • An appeal that everybody likes
  • Part IV. Be a leader: how to change people without giving offense or arousing resentment: If you must find fault, this is the way to begin
    • How to criticize, and not be hated for it
    • Talk about your own mistakes first
    • No one likes to take orders
    • Let the other person save face
    • Make the fault seem easy to correct
    • Making people glad to do what you want

16:00 – Jay’s Perspectives

  • What did you like best about this book? 
    • How it shows a positive – but unvarnished – view of humanity. We’re confused,  self-centered, vulnerable and emotional. We crave sympathy and praise. We want to be understood and appreciated.
  • Share a favorite quote (maybe 2). Why did this quote(s) stand out?
    • “There’s magic, positive magic, in such phrases as: ‘I may be wrong. I frequently am. Let’s examine the facts.”
    • “Talk to people about themselves and they will listen for hours.”
  • What did you learn from this book / How did this book change you?
    • Showed me that other people have the same needs I do. Helped me to start listening better.
  • What did you like least? (critique)
    • A little dry. Could use some more intrigue, juice. 
  • What question(s) would you ask the author?
    • How To Win Friends was published when Carnegie was 48 years old. That’s a long time to wait for your “big success.” Was that hard?
  • Any other related/connected books that you’d recommend to others?

22:00 – Matt’s Perspectives

  • What did you like best about this book? 
    • How optimistic and positive the book is when it comes to learning how to be successful when interacting with people. 
  • Share a favorite quote (maybe 2). Why did this quote(s) stand out?
    • “It isn’t what you have or who you are or where you are or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about it.”
    • “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”
  • What did you learn from this book / How did this book change you?
    • Neat to see the origin of modern “self-help”
  • What did you like least? (critique)
    • Excellent material but the book is a little boring
  • What question(s) would you ask the author?
    • How did Carnegie learn this material?
  • Any other related/connected books that you’d recommend to others?
    • Every self-help book in existence

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